INTO THE SUN
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From the time we are born, we begin to be influenced and molded by our environment. We imitate behavior. We follow role models. We are influenced by what we hear, what we see, what we smell, what we feel and taste. Our senses begin the long road of programming which continues throughout our lives. We are born innocent. Gradually we are tarnished, hardened, and molded into the character we become. At first we are helpless. We depend on our nurturers to feed us, change us, bath us, and provide a time to sleep and rest. When we reach the age of 3 or 4 years old, we begin to understand how our actions can effect our surrounding environment. Crying might get food. Smiling will elicit a laugh. Tantrums can sometimes get results.
Our first ventures in learning are very basic human behaviors: laughing, crying, anger, joy, surprise. Soon we begin the social indoctrination of the educational system. We are taught things that are not necessarily true or right. We are taught things we later find are insignificant. We are taught things that are certainly wrong. Along the way we learn to think. We learn how to gather information with our senses and process the information to develop a conclusion based on the information. But along the way our processing also becomes distorted. And in todays world, we are often deluged with so much information, our processing capabilities break down or become tainted. We tend to follow without questioning. We seek acceptance and strive to be inclusive within the greater social fabric. All of these factors will often blind us to the reality of the world we live in.
Some of us were born as males, others as females. We clearly see the dividing line between each. But a s select few were born between the lines. They did not choose this slight of nature. Yet they must modify their behaviors because of it, for the rest of their lives. The physical properties were a product of science, not of the environment. Society explains these unique individuals through many different terms. Among them hermaphrodites, intersex, DSD (disorder of sexual development), ambiguous genitalia, he-she’s, freaks. Now at this point is where I must make a very important differentiation that has continually confused our society and undermined the struggle of these very human co-inhabitants of our planet. In my opinion, they are not a product of a disorder. They are not freaks. They are only freaks in the respect that we are all freaks on this planet.
Now here is the important differentiation. I will refer to folks that have been born with gender variations as ‘intersex’. Even among their own community, the terminology they prefer is ambiguous. Some prefer to refer to themselves as males or females, whichever gender they most relate to. Others use a variety of different terms. `The Science and Medical community now refer to them as ‘DSD’ or ‘disorder of sexual development’. I don’t like this term at all, it is denigrating. If you require a medical term, I prefer to refer to it as ‘VSD’ or ‘variation in sexual development’. The Intersex community may not like this one either, I don’t know. But I don’t like ‘disorder’.
And I know what many of you are thinking right now, so I’m going to explain. Sexual preference is NOT gender. ‘Sexual preference’ is based on the gender you choose to actively participate in sexual acts with. ‘Gender variation’ is the biological science of variations in physical attributes both external and internal to the human body. Please read these last two sentences very carefully. The misunderstanding between the two has created an injustice that has been promulgated for thousands of years. It is time it STOPPED! Before I explain the distinct differences these two concepts, I would like to explain a little bit about the biological science and the spectrum of gender variations.
It begins the same way this essay began; in the womb. Various factors contribute to the development of a fetus in the womb. All of us begin our lives in the fetus with pre-development female genitalia. Fact. Several biological processes determine the ultimate gender, these include chromosomes (xx, xy or variants), hormone excretions (androgens for male development), physical development of gonads or genitalia (sometimes the process get caught in various phases between the development of female genitalia to male genitalia), and finally a recent discovery, a small section of the brain that is different sizes in males and females. When these individuals are born they do not make a decision on gender preference. At this point, parents and doctors make the decision based on several factors (that’s another story). Sexual preference on the other hand, may be a result of several factors including the size of the area of the brain that determines male/female, hormones, and possibly environmental factors. We’re not certain. And this is not what I am discussing here. But the fact is that many born intersex may be attracted to the opposite gender of the sex that dominates their bodies (or not). Some people with intersex conditions exhibit characteristics of both sexes (androgyny, he/she). And some may even physiologically revert gender at puberty, just like flipping a light switch, because biologically certain androgens do not activate in the body until the late teens or the mid twenties.
To categorize intersex individuals as one size fits all into the Gay, Lesbian and Bisexual community is an injustice to each every one these people that were born with this biological condition. This is the dark shadow of ignorance our society has promoted. Even the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans) community has been guilty of this. It is an in-service and an injustice. I am not close to anyone that I know for certain is intersex. And although I do have many friends that are gay, I am comfortable with my hetero identity and 28 of marriage with tow grown children. But I do know many that may be intersex because they exhibit either strong characteristics of both sexes, or exhibit characteristics of the opposite sex their outward appearance exhibits. They may be intersex or it may be hormonal or it may be neither of these.
This is the line of research I have been obsessed with in the recent past. This is the tragic human condition and social ignorance that has inspired me to initiate a project to enlighten others on scientific facts we are not told or are kept from us. I will do this in the way I know best, through storytelling. I will do it in the way I feel I can tell the story and present the facts accurately to the largest international audience, through documentary storytelling. I will be discouraged and maybe even suppressed by traditionalists, religious fanatics, those that prefer to keep the social status quo intact, or others who just don’t want me to succeed in my goals. But I will promise them this right here in writing today. I WILL NOT desist not will I be silenced. I will light the torch and I will let others light their torches from it to shed light for all of these innocent fellow human beings once and for all. They should not be required to live in slavery by our society because of the biological cards they were dealt at birth from Nature. Nature is God and God is Nature. And they deserve the same joys in life all others enjoy.
So I am asking you to please share this essay/link with others. Help me open people’s eyes that sex determination is science. And those caught in the middle of both sides deserve our respect. But don’t take my word for it. Do the research. Visit Wiki or Google or the Facebook page I created. Because I think if you do the research for yourself and once you know the facts, you will understand people in a whole new light. And you will be able to provide respect and compassion where you may not have considered it before.
MINDY AT THE COFFEEHOUSE REVISITED
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26
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Mindy leans at me with wide blue eyes
sparkling stars above a steaming cup
of Bailey’s and Vanilla Bean.
Mindy always has a question
really meant for God.
Expecting me to answer her
mystified and energized
in canyon deep philosophy.
Why do lovers lock embraced
in fear and desperation
fighting odds against a world
fighting odds against a universe?
My buttered bowl of grits
stare back at me.
Lump-less and textured white.
Because they know they’ll never win
a vulnerable surrender.
Her fingers rubbing gloss red lips
hungry and seductive.
Listens distant
quite intent and satisfied
enough to pass the salt.
THE DOORS OF PERCEPTION
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ENTER THE DOOR TO THE LIGHT
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IN A TOWN ON A FARM
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dedicated to G. O.
In a town on a farm
not too long ago
a farmer told his livestock
‘this is how it is,
this is how it should be’
and all was well
the chickens were fed
the cows had hay
and all the pigs were happy
in the mud.
One cold December day
the farmers dog went rabid
he told the farmer
‘I don’t care.
it doesn’t matter
we can all do
what ever we want.’
The dog bit the farmer
who later died.
The chickens had no feed
the cows had no hay
and the pigs lost weight
while rolling in the mud
they were not happy.
They all died.
——————————————
CHIQUE GOTH
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25
12
It was around the time of the Middle Ages,
no the real Middle Ages, Goth
we were pretty much scared of anything moving.
We’d piss and shit in the streets.
Damn the smell of it all was horrid.
There were lots of fortune-tellers
making two bits or a byte
as in your mouth bite.
Lots of people using stupid shit
like frog eyes and newt nuts
trying to cure people dying
from black plague, an AIDS 1.0, duh,
or leprosy, venereal disease, or starvation
from no money honey.
Ya’ understand that, don’t ya’?
Religious fruits called monks,
no, not all, Sate-loon child,
there were some good ones hear,
and Court priests walked around
all the time and everywhere,
just like today, really, it was creepy,
in black robes,
and they’d cut your head off
if ya’ didn’t give ’em
a head job or your wife or
something for gods sake.
We ate with our bare hands
and burped and farted at the table.
Now we were Goths.
These kids today,
all dressing up like it’s Halloween
all the time.
As we look back now,
those were the really good times.
Lots of death and rotting flesh
in the streets. Plenty of corruption
and murder and rape.
Now those were the days.
Yeah, the good old Middle Ages days, huh?
CAN YOU HEAR ME?
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DECEMBER 25th is a day created by Wall Street to create prophets. 🙂
All kidding aside, God is anything that is greater than you are. God is also anything smaller than you are.
Call it God, or call it Nature or call it Spirit. There is always a power out there that will always be greater than man can ever hope to be.
Therefore there is no such thing as atheism. Even the self-professed atheist believes in something supreme . . . be it football games, beer or themselves. The bible (both the old and new) and the Quran were written by MEN. And while you will still find Truths in all of the good books, and you will also find paths toward ancient traditional values (respect, honesty, love, compassion, honor, humility, etc., as relevant today as they were when the Greeks wrote about them), and you will find guidance toward enlightenment (knowledge, spirituality) . . . they are still ALL interpretations written by MEN. They will always be biased toward men and against women. And they are also susceptible to half truths told by men while supposedly under the guidance of God (which may be true in some cases), but at other times they may just as well have been under the guidance and influence of drugs, starvation, or delusion.
There are a very small few that teach enlightenment without bias toward any one religion or belief. These are the ‘true prophets’. There are those that refuse to acknowledge any other way except for their own. These include Christians, Muslims and Jews. These are religious dogmatists that mostly serve no one but themselves and their selfish egos and desires. Then there are those that are lost and do not know what to believe.
This is exactly why our modern world is so screwed up. All of the religious dogmatists argue over whose gods and whose profits are supreme. Pissing on each other over righteousness. They forget the one most important pinnacle of all religions. It does not matter what you believe, or where you’ve been, or where you’re going (heaven or hell), or if you know Christ or Yahweh or Mohamed, or not. The only important thing in this life is how you treat others RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOW. Even if you live in the deepest jungles of Africa, or in the most remote villages of the Outback, and have never heard of the white mans gods . . . if you live your live as a good person, whatever lies beyond this life, you deserve to be in the paradise place.
For hose who understand this. Keep the faith. Keep spreading the good word and teaching how to teach enlightenment. For the rest of you . . . get over your holy selves.
DARWIN’S DEMISE
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24
12
When Copernicus gazed into the sun
the Church of Earth fell.
Newton’s apple fell
hit him on his head
and set the world in motion.
Darwin evolved from chimpanzees
and single-cell ocean fish.
I came from Outer Space.
My floating DNA ancestors
wander
far through stars
vibrating masses invisible
eyes won’t see
the universe is.
My DNA ancestors
created
Darwin’s single-cell ocean fish.
Fooled poor Darwin.
Fooling you
and your evolutions.
I am Achilles
My father was a mere human
my mother was a goddess.
I am a Lugal.
Standing on the expanding shoulders
of the mighty Giants.
Your scientists and scholars
all shortsighted
believe Darwin’s Easter Island
only an Earth and an apple
vast oceans
dust whirling winds
fiery endless
motionless.
BRIEF ESSAY ON ECONOMICS
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A BRIEF ESSAY ON ECONOMICS
What is an economy? An economy is people. People trading goods and services with people. Pretty simple, huh? It really is. It’s not as complicated as some might have us think. In fact, making things ‘complicated’ is often the best way undermine an economy. Another way to undermine an economy is secrecy. More on that later, but first, let’s define ‘economy’.
You have an orange orchard and I have an apple orchard. At the end of the week we both had a good crop. So we get together and decide to trade. You trade six of your oranges for six of my apples. We have created an economy. This can go on with our friend who has a strawberry patch or our friend that repairs and makes shoes. We have built an economy. We decide the ‘quality’ and ‘value’ of our products. And based on these two factors, we decide what is ‘fair’ when we trade our beautiful apples for beautiful oranges and vice versa. As long as you continue producing fine oranges and I continue producing fine apples, we are both happy at the end of every week because our families get to sample the best of both worlds. No government intervention, no taxes, no brokers fees, no licensing or permits, no reports or recordkeeping, no stockholders or shares to keep tabs on. Life is simple.
Now one week, a nasty bug gets into your crop (and I didn’t plant it there). But what results is that you’re crop that week is looking somewhat skimpy, while mine is still beautiful and fine. Hence, ‘supply and demand’. Well now this week, six apples for six oranges just will not do. This is not ‘fair’. So we negotiate and decide for this week you will give me two of your skimpy oranges for every one of my apples. We’re both still happy because at least you got a few good apples and for the week, I got quite a few oranges skimpy as they might be. Life is still simple. We are still a strong economy and we still trade fairly and we are all still happy (although you will be much happier when you get rid of those darn bugs).
Life is good. Now here comes the complication part along with the extortion. John Carpetbagger shows up in town one day and tells you he can get rid of your bugs for you, but you have to give him one of every six of your oranges every week he treats your crops. Now you only have five oranges to trade with me. I get less orange’s and you get less apples, but your oranges look better, even though now they may be tainted with a toxic pesticide. Soon the mayor of the town realizes John Carpetbagger is picking up a bundle of oranges every week for treating your crops with a chemical. In his unselfish intent to protect all the growers, he passes a law that requires both of us to give him at least one of our apples or oranges every week so he can protect us and certify John Carpetbagger’s shady treatment methods. At the same time he requires John Carpetbagger to provide him with at least one orange a week so he can be certified and licensed, assuring all the growers that everything is safe.
Now John Carpetbagger asks you for two oranges a week instead of one so he can pay the mayor. So now you give the mayor one orange a week and you give John Carpetbagger two oranges a week and we only end up trading three oranges for three apples every week. Did John Carpetbagger plant that harmful insect in your orchard? We don’t know. But suddenly the following week the nasty insects show up in my orchard, too. The mayor is happy though, because all he has to do is print out a few pieces of paper and sign them and he gets three oranges and three apples every week. John Carpetbagger is happy because all he has to do is spray our crops and give the mayor one apple and one orange every week, but he gets to keep two for himself. After all, John Carpetbagger has to give his manufacturer either one apple or orange every week to get his toxic insect killer. Eventually if we’re smart, we’ll figure out who the manufacturer is, cut a deal and cut John Carpetbagger completely out of the picture. But the mayor still wants his extra apple and orange every week. So the mayor tells us we still have to give him an extra apple or orange for buying it directly from the manufacturer and using it on our crops. He still gets two apples and two oranges every week, even though he only has to print up a few forms and sign them once.
But the mayor is still not happy. He now has a growing family and has to expand his storage facility to store all of the apples, oranges, and strawberries he gets every week. So he creates a new law. He tells us we cannot directly trade apples and oranges with each other and we cannot trade directly with the manufacturer. In order for him to keep track of how many apples and oranges we have, and how many we trade with the manufacturer, he tell us we can now only use his new paper money that he is printing just for us to make things easier. So now the mayor gets to decide how many of his paper ‘notes’ we get for each apple and orange. So we begin trading with the mayor’s new paper ‘notes’. He was giving us one paper note for each apple or orange.
But now he has grandkids, and has a fruit distribution company on the side, and he tells us he will only give us one paper ‘note’ that he prints for every two apples or oranges. That is an example of an economy now complicated and extorted. You have less oranges. I have less apples. John Carpetbagger now runs the mayor’s fruit business and the mayor will soon become governor.
I hope I’ve answered the question ‘what is an economy’ for you in terms anyone can understand. Next time I’ll explain how stocks and bonds work. It’s all just apples and oranges!
TALK TO ME
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TALK TO ME
Write, write, write…
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If you become obsessed with being published, you will become just another frustrated writer like so many others in the world. Write every chance you get, no matter how ludicrous or nonsensical what you write might seem. Write for yourself not for others. Most writers who write to make others happy lose their soul. Don’t ever let any critic frustrate you into not writing, this happens very often to too many writers. All you are doing is giving in to someone who probably doesn’t even know what good writing is, and you only hurt yourself.
Don’t be frustrated by vultures, such as may often be experienced on the web. Experience life! Good writing material comes from true life experience and your unique interpretation. Desktop writers are usually stale or journalists, and we all know most journalists are rarely real writers, they are just paid record keepers. Those that never go beyond their own four walls can not possibly know what the rest of the world feels. Keep pads of paper and a pen wherever you hang out, by your bedside, in the kitchen, at your desk, in the bathroom, in your car…and don’t be afraid to pick them up and use them whenever you can.
Keep your writing organized. If you write a lot of crap and just keep throwing it in drawers, that is where they will die. Type your stuff into a computer. Bind it in an organized fashion. Catalog it. This way you will always know where it is. You will also be able to come back and read it, figure out if it sucks or if it has potential, then polish it till it makes you cream. But don’t over polish. Anything too slick is worthless. It has no heart. Read as much as you can…from other writers, about writing. Read and study all the grammatical rules, then make your own.
Courses and seminars are just fine, I guess…but usually you learn what works for others and not what works best for you. Often they will fill your brain with rules that cramp creativity. Take anything any academic tells you with a grain of salt. Academic writers usually think they know it all and are great writers. Usually they are creatively isolated and lame, and they only write for other academics, who are usually the only ones that understand their misaligned gibberish complete with obscure and insignificant references. Write so that anyone can understand what you read. The more sensibly and sincere you write, the more it has universal appeal and significance. Never, ever take the publishing world seriously. It is a marketplace and like any other marketplace it is full of prostitution and idiots. Treat them as such and you are sure to succeed. Remember… published writers have very often sacrificed their own personal creativity for some sleazy magazine or some high brow snot nosed esoteric rag which hardly anyone reads.
If you do decide to waste your time trying to get published instead of writing…this requires lots of letters, postage and time. Eventually someone will publish you. Never be discouraged by rude editors who never acknowledge or reply…this is a majority in the publishing world. Play the contest game if you like, but if you do, go for the big ones, with big rewards. Don’t waste your time on the little guys, they do little to advance your career. Before you submit anything, polish it. Ask someone with half a brain to read it, and listen to their idiocy, somehow you might manage to extrude a grain of truth. Visit as many little artsy fartsy writer get togethers as you can. Here you will find other hopeless circus clowns, but every now and then you might just meet someone who can actually advance your writing ambitions.
Write, write, write then write some more. Then edit, edit, edit and then edit some more. This is the true secret. And as previously and wisely mentioned…have fun! If you are not having fun when you write, it becomes a job. And in this case you might as well become a journalist, or write for magazines or journals or Hallmark cards. Invest in a current copy of the Writers Handbook. Visit the Poets & Writers web site…these can be good resources if you know how to use them. And finally, never ever put up with anybodies crap or sell your soul. Editors, agents and their kind can be vicious, self-serving and butchers…tell them to kiss your arse. And write what you feel…this way you will always be happy and you will not feel like you are a writing prostitute, like so many other best seller list sluts.
The Gods always seem to be at war with each other.
I see it on TV.
A friend of mine has it on their smart phone as an app.
People walk around or sit all day
staring at their mini-screens or big screens
watching the Gods at war.
Some of them just enjoy the Gods at war.
Others type as fast as their thumbs and fingers can move
either helping the Gods at war keep fighting
or they are busy typing away
thinking they can get the Gods at war to stop fighting . . .
maybe they can.
But the real war, well the real war
is convincing
all of those people
with or without big screens and mini screens
that the Gods at war are not worth watching.
And the Gods at war are not worth fighting for.
The Gods have fought before.
And only men suffered.
The Gods do not suffer.
They are Gods.
Only men suffer.
Women suffer even more than men.
Are the Gods only at war for us
like the Greeks said they were?
Trying to save us
from themselves
or from other Gods not quite so benevolent?
Only the Gods would know the answer.
They are Gods.
We are only men and women.
Have we ever asked the Gods
why
they were at war???
Would they even want us to know
how imperfect their world was?
After all a Universe of Gods where they had to fight each other?
You would think as Gods
since they already knew everything
they would be at peace.
We are the Gods to ants and roaches.
We watch them or
we kill them.
Do we ever try to help them?
They only like to watch us fight.
It’s the only way they know they are safe.
As long as we’re not fighting
hungry over them.
Why are the Gods at war?
—————————————————
f j llorente
July 11 2012
thank you Stephane Mallarme – Poet (1842-1898)
for re-inspiring my visual verse
Welcome friends and frolickers!
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Step in, set and stay, and stop back.
I will stain these empty pages with ink bits of inktell and ornery arts.
Stay tuned!
Across the sands of time. . .
THE CIRCUS . . . . . . . . . AND THE ZOO 
